who let these animals into my kingdom?

it's been two weeks and i still can't get over this harmless interaction. from now on i'm waiting at a different shuttle stop where something about the lighting prevents such cretins* (a.k.a. friendly grad students in other departments) from lurking (i.e. talking).

her: blah blah blah, so what do you do outside of school?
me: [blank stare, forced laughter]

would-have-been-acceptable answers:

1. i go to shows, actually i am in a band; yeah we play high school band instruments and stuff
   
2. i "party" with my friends
3. i fancy myself some sort of hobbyist (in my kitchen, in outdoor adventures)
4. i write pithy social criticism for an obscure publication
5. i fight for all the good "-isms" and against all the bad "-isms"
6. i own my own business, solving your middle class hangups from my trusty dodge caravan
   

cold-hard-truth answers:

1. i drink alone and eat overpriced frozen organic food
2. i read embarrassing classic novels and financial self-help books
3. i do everything you do on the internet, except more frequently
4. i grocery shop for "fun"
5. sometimes little birds stop flying and look me in the eye
6. i sit in cafes and pay diligent attention to other people's** conversations: an architect and an interior designer discussing the textbook they are co-authoring, old ladies praising some style of brassiere in front of "uncle joe", one art history grad student mentoring another who is writing her dissertation prospectus (dialogue below)
   

mentor: oh. are you post-feminist?
mentee, (definitively and immediately): yes.
mentor: i understand. it's a generational thing.
me (in my head): is it?!
mentee: i just don't want to write about gender and that kind of stuff.
me (in my head): so this is what feminism has been reduced to!

*apparently south alabama defines a cretin as "one whose physical and mental development has been retarded or arrested due to thyroid deficiency"
**i neglected to mention the streetside table where a gay couple sat down across from...you guessed it - a woman studying to be a sex therapist. and yes, she did switch chairs to be closer to them.